I know this isnt a popular philosophy, especially among mothers, but hear me out. Its no secret that my faith is of utmost importance, so God comes first in my life no matter what. But regardless of your belief system, your husband should come before your kids. Now unless youre married to someone who is abusive (in which case, I urge you to seek help beyond what my opinion can give you), no man in his right mind would ask you to put your kids aside to serve his every need while neglecting them. Thats not what this means. When you board an airplane, the flight attendants are required to go over emergency preparedness prior to take off. When explaining the part about how to operate the oxygen mask, passengers are instructed to first put the mask on themselves before putting it on their small child. Is that because they think you are more important than your kids? Absolutely not. But you cannot effectively help your child if you cant breathe yourself. The same holds true with marriage and parenting. You cannot effectively parent your children if your marriage is falling apart. Take it from me I tried. There will also come a time when your kids will leave the house to pursue their dreams as adults. If you have not cultivated a lasting relationship with your spouse, you will have both empty nests and empty hearts.